Here are some simple truth messages you can be sending to married couples on a regular and rotating basis. Get these messages out there and support them with programs and resources that teach the skills to make these twenty-five things happen.
- Be generous with affection.
- Don’t just care; show it.
- Practice gratitude daily.
- Get into your spouse’s world.
- Be open to sexual learning.
- Talk about sex.
- Become an expert on what your spouse enjoys.
- Negotiate parenting responsibilities.
- Openly admire your spouse’s accomplishments.
- Balance your conversations – The talker needs to talk less, the listener needs to talk more.
- Don’t talk when you’re angry.
- Negotiate relationships with extended family and friends.
- Discover and pursue mutual hobbies.
- Negotiate household chores.
- Block out at least 15 hours of couple time each week.
- Save your best of everything for your spouse.
- Be completely honest in a respectful way.
- Share calendars.
- Don’t keep secrets.
- Eat right and exercise.
- Be fashionable in the way that pleases your spouse, not someone else.
- Learn what annoys your spouse; stop doing it.
- Negotiate a household budget that reflect your shared priorities.
- Make a home that shelters and expresses your marriage.
- God first; spouse second; children third; all else follows.
One final note. When you work with married couples, start by teaching proven skills for marriage rather than starting with doctrines or moral teachings. Good theology grows from thoughtful and inspired reflection on human experience. Use the social sciences to learn about these skills. Here are two websites where you can learn much about marriage skill building: